Listening to these two bros pontificate over what makes a man got me to thinking.
Manliness talk is cartoonishly idiotic.
Is there even a mathematical term for how infinitesimal a percentage of these conversations aren’t steeped in profound insecurity?
Fear of insufficient scruff. Fear of what other men think of his fighting and sexual prowesses. Fear of women or insufficiently manly men holding sway in any respect. Fear of feelings. All of these and more drive the macho-conscious to display the plumage of mascumale virility as loudly as possible, and to spew narrow, archaic platitudes of what a man must be.
It’s one thing to grow a beard because you like beards, or to heed fashion tips so you look maximally dapper in a suit. Learning self-defense is a sensible idea. Know how to change a tire and how to wield tools. But do them because you want to and because they’re useful, not because you need them to validate your testosterone.
Show me a guy who thinks facial hair and an expensive suit make him a man, and I’ll show you a guy who feels emasculated without them.
Just by worrying about this stuff, a guy shows he probably hasn’t got it. He’ll try to emulate Teddy Roosevelt in 500 ways, but not in the one way that matters — that Roosevelt most likely never paused to think, “Am I being enough of a man for everybody?”
Here’s how to be a fantastic human being: Take care of yourself. Work hard. Have fun. Be nice to people. See the value in them. Have empathy. Handle your business. Celebrate your strengths and accomplishments. Own up to your shortcomings. Pick your battles. Give appropriate weight to gripes and criticism and not an ounce more. Don’t be afraid of your feelings. Help others when they need it. Don’t be afraid to seek help when you need it. Make sure if someone has a problem with you, that it’s their problem, not yours. Be yourself.
Everything else is nonsense.
Now watch tough guy Terry Crews get it right: