Thursday, March 08, 2012

Our latest entry in the Conservative Song Challenge

For years, I've been pleading with Republicans to create a good political song. Several innate factors typically prevent this:

1) Conservatism and creativity tend not to mix;
2) Catchy hooks and clever wordplay tend to take a backseat to shoehorning in every aspect of the philosophy being pushed;
3) Which is done with all the subtlety of bricks hurled from mountaintops;
4) Half of the song is about how liberals/not them are wrong and/or evil;
5) The artists tend to be angry and vindictive types you'd avoid at parties;
6) Even by YouTube standards, the songs age quickly.

Today, I saw this ode to Rick Santorum. It's apparently not a joke. It's also not terrible.

Make no mistake — it's not great. It smacks of, "Let's set this campaign pamphlet to music" just like most of its brethren. And there's the amusing temptation to sing, "Gay mon" instead of, "game on." But you at least get the impression that First Love is a band that happens to be conservative, not conservatives who try to be a band. And as ridiculous as the lyrics can be (Santorum aims to raise morale?), they do offer that rare show of support for its own sake. Their brief partisan jabs — in the form of returning to the Constitution and the Rule of the People — are so subtle that they barely register on the Republidar. Also, this family seems like they'd be more fun company than the Right Brothers, the Young Cons or Krista Branch (there's a sweepstakes for you). But what really sells the song is that it's actually a decent, catchy tune, with a meter that suggests some thought was put into it. 

It's no wonder First Love breaks the right-wing mold, because they've never had cable. Which means they've never seen Fox News, lest it turn them into hoodlums. They've got a point there. They also claim never to have bought magazines, so I'm assuming they read them in the store (or online). They've also never been to public school, which presumably accounts for all the unnecessary apostrophe's on their website.

In any case, bravo to First Love for coming as close as Republicans have gotten to a decent song in some time. I just hope Santorum doesn't find the video too raunchy, what with all the girls in it.

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