Monday, March 05, 2012

Dear Neal Boortz,

I just read “Idiotic, Mindless, Stupid Republicans,” because I was a little shocked that you wrote something that wasn’t completely garbage from the get-go. And while I wasn’t surprised at your concession that the GOP has shot itself in the foot, I was somewhat taken aback that you think the liberal conspiracy fired the gun.

For starters, I doubt the existence of a liberal conspiracy. We’re just not wired that way. Hell, we’re barely wired for winning elections. We don’t have anyone on the level of Rush Limbaugh, nor do we have sufficient dittoheads necessary to crown one. Yes, a lot of us feel passionately about the same issues, which I suppose you could construe as lockstep thinking. But really, how hard is it to oppose elective war over dubious allegations, or the ever-widening economic gap between the rich and the poor, or the push to deny civil rights to various groups?

And that’s where my major beef lies with you, Neal. You seem to think that the contraception debate is a liberal Lee Atwater-type tactic intended to sabotage the election for the Republicans. As if all liberals got together into some kind of Conspiracy Committee and said, “This birth control debate could really help us gain the coveted 18-49 independent female demographic. It could really hurt the already ailing Republican ticket. All right, George, get on TV and motivate the minions!”

You say that Sandra Fluke purposefully chose a Jesuit school just so, one day, she could raise her activist profile by complaining about birth control. Because it’s not at all possible that, as a woman, this is something she cares about? And would no matter where she went?

Look, I realize that Republicans are used to acting this way because by and large, they have to be told what to think. Unless pulling a collective, simultaneous 180 on such GOP-generated ideas as cap-and-trade and the health care mandate was personal growth. As was the sudden, fully grown hatred for obscure, long-running organizations such as ACORN and the Tides Foundation. Though that leaves me confused over why I can count on at least five separate conservatives I know to spout the same talking points on any given day.

My point being, you guys seem to be ideologically flexible when time and outrage calls for it, so maybe it’s hard for you to understand how we think. See, we aren’t outraged over the ongoing contraception issue because George Stephanopoulos told us to be — it’s because it’s outrageous! I would feel the same way if the Catholic Church announced the news to me. The source doesn’t matter; it’s the fact that angers us. Likewise with Rick Santorum’s words — they’re horrifying because that’s what he, as a significant presidential candidate, really thinks. Don’t blame “some Democrat somewhere” for finding the video. It makes you look, um, idiotic.


And don’t even get me started on how the right to contraception is not in the Constitution. By that token, guns aren’t a right either because the Constitution doesn’t spell out the word “guns.” Best not to paint yourself into the strict-constructionist corner.

The one thing you are right about, Neal, is that the Republicans are doomed in this presidential cycle. And believe me, it’s all on you guys. No liberal conspiracy, if there was one, could possibly do as much damage to the conservative cause as the type of misogynist mindset that thinks “tail of woe” is a witty pun. Or that many other things you say in your article demean both women and college students with a disturbing breeziness that seems to ensure the GOP will remain idiotic, mindless and stupid for years to come.

Or is it my fault for pointing it out? If so, sorry to exert my infinite liberal-media power in such a fashion.

Please write back!

Your friend, 
Ian

No comments: