Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Stop shootin' your mouths off!

By Earl "Clem" Bob
Tea party contributor

Like all pro-American Americans, I’m devastated by the tragic events of this weekend’s shooting in Tucson, Arizona. Among the dead was an innocent 9-year-old girl. I pray for her and the other victims. Even that federal judge.

Sorry. That dig was unfair. I told myself I wouldn’t stoop to the levels of the compassion-challenged anti-patriots what insist on pissin’ on the graves of these heroes by talking about the circumstances of the shootings.

I mean, honestly, why bring up politics and society at a tragic time like this? We should be mourning the victims and prayin’ and helplessly blubberin’ and whatnot. That’s the right way to honor the lives of the fallen. Everything else is just nitpickin’.

What gets lost in all this hoo-hah is each victim’s story. For example, the young girl, Christina Taylor Green, was born on Sept. 11, 2001. Isn’t that crazy? Out of a day of death and misery sprang life, only to be snuffed out by a cowardly, gun-totin’ American 10 years later.

Tragic. But definitely nothin’ to get political about.

Anyway, it’s not like Jared Loughner was one of us tea party members. He was kicked out of school because they thought he was unstable. His list of favorite books and his ramblin’ YouTube videos suggest he’s an incoherent fella who doesn’t know what the hell he believes in. Also, he was said to be on the far left. So there.

It’s pretty unlikely someone that unstable would ever take a shot at a politician.

But of course, liberals love that this happened, because it gives them the opportunity to condemn fiery conservative rhetoric. Dare I say it? This is like their 9/11!

And who do they target first? Sarah Palin, of course!! What did she do? Of all the triggers she’s pulled, this was one time that she kept the ammo in her pocket. Sure, I’ve seen that crosshair map of hers! Did it lead me to go shoot those people? Hell no! I get what it means. That map ain’t like some sacred thing like the American flag or the cross — it’s just a symbol. A metaphor. A simile. A haiku. No one in their right minds would associate the SarahPAC crosshairs map with any form of violence. All it is is an inspiration to her supporters. And a damn clever example of free speech. And I’ll defend to the death her right to display it!

Still, it was gracious of her to take it down. As she often says about her website, “Don’t retweet, reload.”

Sharron Angle also took some heat for her past remarks about “Second Amendment remedies.” As if anything can be read into that. And that quote about watering the liberty tree with blood? That’s Thomas Jefferson! Unfortunately, it appears that you can’t even quote our Founding Fathers and our Constitution these days without being accused of inciting violence. Thanks, progressives! The shooters who take it too far don’t help either.

Will you just stop already? Please?

It’s not like the left’s closet is empty either. Look on any liberal forum, especially ones from the Bush era, and you’ll find plenty of calls to arms. Here’s just one I found by Googling “left violence bush hate commies kill crosshairs”:

ive had enough already. this country’s gone to hell in a fundamentalist handbasket. Bu$Hitler and his minions are gonna continue their assault on our civil liberties and kill any standing we still have in the world. will we even have any freedom’s left? i hope their isn’t violence in the streets before its over. but if there is, they’ll prob. label us commies and round us up. this hate-fear attitude sucks, and i hope people come to their sense in 2008. until then, ill keep bush and co. in my proverbial crosshairs, never letting up on them here on this forum.
Posted by jackknife on 03-Nov-04

So from here on out, you show me Sarah Palin, and I’ll show you jackknife. We’re even.

If there’s anything life has taught ol’ Clem, it’s that you never judge a book by its cover. For my friends who’ve never judged a book because they ain’t ever seen one, what I’m trying to say is, the first impression isn’t always the right one. I learned that recently when a Mexican held up the Gas-E-Mart on Farm Road 65. When we heard the news, we naturally assumed that the guy was a no-account freeloading thug probably brought into our country illegally by Janet Napolitano. That sparked a major illegal-immigration protest along the highway. (Carl drew “a Second Amendment fence” on his sign where the fence posts were all guns. It was a riot!) Wuss, the guy who drives the Toyota Penis hybrid, warned us not to rush to judgment on the guy. Turns out, the perpetrator was born and raised 20 miles away. He didn’t even have an accent or nothin’. Needless to say, we all learned somethin’ that day about the danger of speculation. I still hate illegal immigrants, though.

Let my recent lesson be a lesson to all of you liberals. In the end, it should be obvious to everyone that the Tucson shooting was simply a messed-up guy spraying bullets. Why isn’t that enough for some of you? Why make it worse by suggesting that he chose to let loose at a political event? That he targeted the politician and the federal judge leading the gathering? Why does your ilk insist on reading all sorts of undertones that aren’t there? This was random violence, period! Random violence!

Now, please, will you let it go?

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