Friday, December 03, 2010

This isn't what they meant by "White Christmas"

This happened in 2010. Seriously.
Iced Tea the Snowman was a racialistic soul
With his cornpone tripe and a struttin’ pose
And two eyes cut out a cone.

Iced Tea the Snowman, cautionary tale they say,
He was white as snow and the rednecks know
That he’d drum the strife one day.

It must have been so tragic
Oh that old dunce cap they found
And when they draped it on his head
He still couldn’t dance around!

O, Iced Tea the Snowman
Was as white as he could be,
And the pundits say he would hate all day
The NAACP



Thumpetty thump thump,
Thumpety thump thump,

Look at Iced Tea flow.
Thumpetty thump thump,
Thumpety thump thump,

Over bell curves of snow.


Iced Tea the Snowman
Knew the cross was hot that day
So he said, “Let’s shun and we’ll make Duke run

Just like them good ol' days."

Down to the village
With a bullwhip in his hands,
Rolling here and there all around the square saying,
“Catch one if you can!”

Rolled alone down the streets of town
Right to the vice-beat cop.
And he claimed he had no meth on him
Then he hollered out, “Narc!”

Iced Tea the Snowman
Was gonna be put away,
But he waved goodbye saying, "Y’all should die,

South’ll rise again some day."

Thumpetty thump thump,
Thumpety thump thump,

Look at sewage melt.
Thumpetty thump thump,
Thumpety thump thump,
Over the Babble Belt.

3 comments:

NOLA Progressive said...

Well done...sad that it was there for inspiration, but well done.

rhonda said...

///////facepalm.

Daudi said...

Love a happy ending.