1) I have a master’s degree, but I’ve never taken the SAT.
2) I didn’t set foot outside of the southern United States until I was 19.
3) Until the set I got this year, every license plate I’ve ever used had 2 as the first number. A vast majority of my family’s plates also started with 2. All of my plates have expired in February, even if I didn’t buy the car then.
4) My ideal career, based on the things I like most, is truck driver. That doesn’t mean, however, that I want to be a truck driver.
5) Throughout my entire childhood, there was never a doubt in my mind that I would become a professional athlete. I didn’t even dream about it; I just took it as a given.
6) People in Missouri generally assume I’m local, whereas people in my hometown ask me where I’m from.
7) I’ve worn a tie twice in the last four years. I prefer it that way.
8) A decade apart, my mom and I both did the old KLFY-TV 10 news bumper, “Stay tuned for more news with Jim/Chuck and Maria.”
9) I had a chance to meet/possibly appear in a WWF skit with The Rock 12 years ago, and I declined it. I am stupid.
10) Almost every woman I’ve dated was a brunette. It just worked out that way for some reason.
11) When I was 5, I decided I looked stupid smiling in pictures, so I came up with a new expression. And so there are many pictures of me floating around from that time where it looks like my jaw is broken.
12) I went vegetarian for about two months in 2004, and it was the most weight I ever gained. It was the only time people ever came up to me and went, “What happened to YOU?”
13) I take that back. It happened again when I whittled myself down to a skeletal 144 pounds during a long period of unemployment, warehouse work and bike-riding.
14) Almost every really good friend I have today was the outcast at their high school. Ironic, considering I was pretty popular then (which is itself ironic).
15) I love chronology. Whenever I read about an important event, I like to imagine where I was at that exact moment, and I often can remember. I find it fascinating to watch footage of Super Bowl XII while knowing that, 100 miles away, my mom was about to give birth to her first child. Stuff like that.
16) Some of my fondest memories are things I did completely alone and never told anyone about. Like spending a day walking around Kansas City.
17) A handful of my memories are things I can't remember if I did them or if I just dreamed about doing them.
18) I sometimes call people the name of who I think they look like. This is always an
accident, and it's almost always a compliment. Still, I constantly worry about doing this on a date. Because sometimes they look like someone else I dated.
19) I often think 10 moves/associations ahead, so sometimes I'm hard to follow. But if you asked me to backtrack from one topic to another, it'll make perfect sense.
20) I can run into people I haven't seen in 20 years and they will recognize me immediately. Which is weird, because my face, clothing choices and the shape and even color of my hair have changed since then.
21) It's very hard for me to watch the beginning of some of my favorite movies. Because it feels like the bus could have stayed under 50, you know?
22) On my 6th birthday, I went on a present-opening frenzy. After the first several unwraps, my grandmother fussed at me to stop. “Those are your brother’s presents!” Huh?!! Story of my life. (Though, to be fair, I had myself gotten a present on his 6th birthday two years before. But still. STILL.)
23) I have a strong memory, but it doesn’t always serve me well. For example, I have a scar on my lip from when I was 3 years old. Officially, it happened when I was chasing my brother around our house and I slipped and slammed against the corner of a room. I remember it happening at McDonald’s after I shoved a kid off a playland stool and took his place, and he apparently shoved back. In any event, I remember sitting next a bathroom mirror while my mom and some other woman freaked out over my bloody, screaming mouth. I also remember thinking, that blood is spelling out numbers on my lip. Who knows what that’s all about?
24) I once got disciplined in my preschool class for refusing to eat a banana with a giant bruise on it. I was told that I was being wasteful and essentially was not keeping an open mind about food. Well, that last part was and is true, but I love bananas. Just not with bruises.
25) I’m determined to make some positive change in the world.