I'm currently undertaking the most thorough cleaning of my closet in years. I've lived in my current abode for just over three years, but I'm a terminal pack rat, so some of these boxes date back more than a decade. Here are some of the crazier items I've found so far:
I've had this pack of valentines since high school. And to think I'm still single...
The ER bracelet from my concussion. In "What a Concussion Feels Like," I wrote how I read this bracelet and told them my birthday was wrong, even though nothing resembled it. Well, apparently that was wrong, since my birthdate is as clear as day on the label. It must have been my address I thought was on there. I can't remember (rim shot). But I've changed it on that piece, so let's roll with that revisionist history.
I bought my first vehicle, a 1993 Chevy S-10 pickup truck, for $900 in 1999. The radio, though fully functional, had most of its faceplate ripped out. Additionally, the digital display had been smashed in, several buttons were missing/constantly falling off and the cassette player's slot was cavernous enough for an 8-track tape. To cover up this eyesore, I meticulously cut this piece of paper to fit. As icing on the cake, I made it informative as well as MacGyverish, with a listing of my FM presets. Over the next six years, I went through three or four more of these, each more artistic than the last, as formats changed (stations 2 and 3 above, for example, didn't make it past the Clinton administration), until I finally just went with "RADIO" for the last one.
For further truck-related reading, check out the owner's manual. Life lessons, friends.
What's remarkable about these wannabe 3-D glasses isn't that they're dated 1986; it's that I caught them at a Mardi Gras parade in 1999. In mint condition. The damage you see here is the result of two moves, years tucked tightly in a box and my general inability to handle collectibles with kid gloves. Vintage unwrapped Transformers wouldn't stand a chance with me.
Referendum 1 was a proposal that would have taken money allotted to UL Lafayette's Vermilion newspaper (for which I was a columnist at the time) and diverted it toward bringing free copies of the local daily newspaper to campus. Not a bad idea, but given that our student paper received a whopping $2 from each student per semester, we weren't too thrilled about how the referendum would tie knots in our frayed shoestrings. The Student Government Association (SGA) placed these cards all over campus. Every chance I got, I'd deface them like this. I also wrote a column urging students to vote it down. The referendum failed, no doubt entirely because of my efforts. And somehow, we wound up getting the free Daily Advertisers anyway. Viva democracy!
My mom gave me this booklet many years ago, her most telling gift since that time she bought me Clearasil. Maybe I should take a break from cleaning the closet and read it, finally.