Rule #158: Oil Apologies
To all of you out there trying to paint BP and the rest of the oil-and-gas industry as the victims here: STOP. Yes, we know lots of people depend on the industry as their livelihood. Yes, all workers aren't guilty by association for the penny-pinching hubris of company executives and others tasked with the bad decisions that led to the disaster. Yes, we still need fossil fuels at this juncture. And yes, job losses are always terrible.
But enough with the persecution complex. Forgive me if I don't indulge your spiteful rants about excessive government "shakedowns." Or your disgust over how this has given your industry a black eye. Or how you think Obama should stay out of the way/do more, depending on what he's doing at the moment. It's not persecution or vilification if it's entirely justified. Anyway, I don't recall hearing any serious figure saying we need to stop drilling for and using oil. Saying we need to plan for a future where we use cleaner, less expensive and less-perilous forms of energy isn't a diss; it's common sense. And with this spill, it just got a hell of a lot more common.
And don't even send me that old e-mail about how Louisianians should be living like Saudi sheiks. Your blitheringly ignorant call for greed modeled on one of the world's most repressive nations rang hollow even before said greed led to the utter destruction of an entire ecosystem. Really. Retire that one right now. It deserves to go the way of the dinosaurs that your industry just spilled in the Gulf of Mexico.
Rule #159: Benjamin Like Button
You are not your baby, even on Facebook. My friend feed looks like a casting call for "Baby Geniuses 3: Oddly Net-Savvy Superchildren." Especially weird is when a friend I haven't seen since childhood looks exactly the same...because they now have a kid that age. Either that, or they use some really good cold cream.
That said, I understand if you want to show off the pride of your life. But baby talk in the profile...well...let's just say I got your ripe diaper right here.