Saturday, February 21, 2009

Blah blah blah

Rule #71: P standing up
Note to libertarians: capitalizing the word "people" does not add legitimacy to your argument, nor does it make you Founding Father-y. There's a profound difference between the preamble to the Constitution and your letter to the editor about allocation of local sewerage fees. In your case, the only capital P should be in "Podunk."

Rule #72: What a waste...of syllables
"Sewerage" is an absurd word. Do city councils also talk about "welfarare?"

Rule #73: Adults back in charge
At least for the time being, reporters have to say "Obama White House" instead of just "White House." Yesterday, when the administration was reported as fighting back against CNBC's Rick Santelli, I defended him out of habit - which should never, ever happen. Gross! But I guess this is a good problem to have these days.

Rule #74: Bully bears
TV financial analysts have to be boring again. Much has been said about the power of Democrats to kill the economy with a mere shrug of the shoulder, yet people like Rick Santelli and Jim Cramer leaping around screaming "socialism" and "We're gonna die!" has no effect? What's worse is that these guys are treated as experts. And maybe they are, but I can tell you from personal experience that being on TV is not as hard as it sounds. It's kind of like writing horoscopes; they seem sacred until you write them for your middle-school newspaper. If I want to see people hysterically jumping around panicking about money, I'll look in the mirror.

The rest of the rules

1 comment:

rhonda said...

how about those bizarre creatures who are suddenly libertarian and super pissed, but never had so much as peep to say over the last eight years? the NOOOW conscientious objectors. those are my favorite.