Thursday, December 04, 2008

Not dead

I'm currently in Lafayette, where my Internet access is as reliable as Britney Spears driving a taxicab. Combined with my erratic cell phone and MySpace's "profile maintenance," my ability to communicate seems to be thwarted by God Itself. Which makes my inability to explain my problem to anyone suck all the more.

But now that both my connection and the program I want to use are both working (finally), I'd like to share a few observations from this past week:

- Plaxico Burress shot himself in the foot by shooting himself in the thigh. He may have taken the title of All-Time NFL Idiot from joint-holders Michael Vick and Albert Connell (as well as literal joint holder Ricky Williams). Not only was every detail of the caper dumb (Bringing a loaded gun into a club? In your sweatpants? In the midst of the Roger Goodell less-than-zero-tolerance conduct crackdown? During an 11-1 season?), but the timing was just as bad. Come on, Plaxico! You were just four weeks away from cementing a positive answer to the question, "What was New York Giants wide receiver Plaxico Burress known for in 2008?" But now, the answer has nothing with to do your winning Super Bowl catch against the heavily favored Patriots; now you're just some goof with a gun.

- I've been told my shaggy hair makes me look like Drew Brees. Pictures forthcoming, because right now I'm just lucky to have text capabilities.

- I can get all the way from Springfield, Missouri, to Friendship, Arkansas on less than seven gallons of gas. That's just over 266 miles. Not bad. Loved the girl's accent, too.

- There's more ahead.

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