Friday, December 26, 2008

2008: My year in staying resolute

A look back at my New Year's resolutions for 2008, and how I fared with them:

1) Try out for the New Orleans Saints. They need a few good men in their defensive secondary, and I could fill in at either cornerback or free safety. Yeah, yeah, I know the NFL doesn't have open tryouts. But really, what are they afraid of? That I'll be bad?

The Saints apparently took this warning to heart, as even Jason David has been pulling his weight in the past several games. Ironically enough, with my oodles of physical therapy and weekly football games these past few months, I could almost make this offer for real now. Not quite, though, unless we're talking about the Detroit Lions...

2) Vote for Barack Obama in the Missouri primary and then, eventually, whatever Democrat wins the nomination. Because that's the only way that this country will even begin to start healing itself.

Yeah, that worked out like I'd hoped, even if Missouri picked the loser for only the second time in a century (the last miss being in 1954). Still, my presidential vote in November came as close to almost counting as it ever has, so that's encouraging.

3) Further my progress toward eating more organic and home-cooked food.

I did this literally to the point where I began to crave even the box for Totino's pizza, which I'm sure isn't the goal of eating well. But I've persevered and will continue to do so.

4) Don't go bankrupt...

Not there yet, but even with Vampire Double Cross Insurance I had more than $1,000 worth of out-of-pocket expenses this year. For me, that's 2,000 meals. Or 38 healthy, nutritious meals.

5) Stop shopping at Wal-Mart.

Mission accomplished. And not in the George W. Bush-Iraq War "Mission Accomplished" sense, but in the sense that I actually accomplished the mission. And that there was a clear mission to accomplish.

6) Blog more and more furiously. With an election year coming, that shouldn't be too difficult. Also, I want to make more videos, as soon as I figure out what it is with my camera that adds 45 pounds to my face.

Mission Accomplished, in the George W. Bush sense. This was probably my weakest year ever for blogging, though the same could be said for just about every creative and social goal that I had in 2008. Time for Change.

7) Stop being so hard on myself. Man, am I hard on myself! I could absolve myself of this problem if only I weren't such a FRUSTRATINGLY PERFECTIONIST PIECE OF CRAP!!! YOU SCUM! dROP AND GIVE ME 20! AND 20 MORE FOR THE TYPO IN THAT LAST SENTENCE!! GRARARARARAUGUGUGH!!

I think this actually got worse this year.

8) Lay the groundwork for a future New Year's resolution.

Didn't have time. But each year holds out fresh hope.

9) Turn 28. This one I think I can keep.

And I did. However, my resolve doesn't seem likely to hold up on this one in 2009.

10) Of course, I'd be amiss without mentioning the one thing that everyone can get behind in this tumultuous time: washboard abs. Oh yeah.

If you see them at the right angle, with the light just so (and if I haven't had any water in the last 36 hours), you can see some decent definition. It took me two years last time, so I'm halfway there. Hope! Change! Maybe a tan in a few months! Wheee!

Five and a half out of 10. In the NFC West, I'd have a playoff berth.

Happy rest of holidays!

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