Friday, March 30, 2007

Carpet begging

--I think the anti-John Breaux crowd has a point about him being unqualified for the Louisiana governorship because he lives in Maryland. As someone who recently moved from Louisiana, I can attest that I've forgotten completely about the state and its issues. Every time you apply for a driver's license in a new state, the camera flash zaps your brain like a Men In Black neuralyzer, immediately robbing you of any trace of your past life, regardless of how many years you spent championing the state and its needs. Didn't know that, huh? THAT'S THE IDEA!!

But seriously...Breaux is the best choice out of everyone who's running. Why? To use Nick the Conservative Cajun's own words against him, Breaux has "not voted in any of our state elections over the past two years." Considering how things have turned out in that time frame, that may be the best endorsement a Louisiana candidate can have. Nick likens Breaux to the Huey P. Long and Edwin Edwards eras of gubernatorial politics. I don't see it that way; I see a genuine chance for redemption here. Louisiana's been in some murk as of late, and maybe our best weapon in the fight is someone who represented us competently back when things were better. Oh yeah, there's also that 33-year track record in Congress.

(Sidebar: I say "us" because I'm referred to as "that guy from Louisiana" by people who know me in Missouri. I'm sure Breaux feels the same way in Maryland. Just a thought.)

This argument against Breaux is absurd anyway; are they really saying that Breaux is out of touch because he's been in the D.C. area for too long? Really?!! Couldn't the same be said about every member of Congress? Last I checked, Louisiana politics doesn't change that much. Same shit, different colon. Or, same colon, different shit. Let's at least get someone in who knows what they're doing, and might actually get some respect for it. It would be a refreshing change.

Anyway, this isn't the 1850s. If I can read up-to-the-minute Louisiana news from Missouri, then I'm sure Breaux has the means to stay abreast with happenings in the state. Hell, he did it for 18 years in the Senate and 15 years in the House without the Internet.

But if we are going to end all appearances of carpetbagging, let's do it at all levels; from now on, only residents of Washington D.C. can run for president. Real residents, too, not people like George H.W. Bush, who lived in D.C. as president but paid taxes in Maine and cited a hotel suite in Houston as his real residence. Or Dick Cheney, who evaded a constitutional clause in his race for vice president by pretending he still lived in Wyoming. Or Hillary Clinton...but only because I favor Barack Obama for president, who handily stomped the nakedly carpetbagging Alan Keyes in his Senate race.

--Note to the Times of Acadiana: It's "Broadmoor Park," not "Broadmoore Park." Unless you're talking about Moore Park, which makes the blatant misspelling all that much worse.

--On that same page, the Times notes that New Mexico's recent cockfighting ban makes Louisiana the only state to still allow the practice. Kind of like how Louisiana is the only state that has parishes. Except dumb.

--Last night I was carded...for an R-rated movie. What the hell? After the woman saw that I was nearly 27, she shrugged and said, " look young?"


Nick said...

I find it interesting that someone who claims to want Louisiana to reform its leadership will support someone who IS part of the politics of the last 30 years of the state.

Come on, Icon.

Leigh C. said...

"I say 'us' because I'm referred to as 'that guy from Louisiana' by people who know me in Missouri. I'm sure Breaux feels the same way in Maryland. Just a thought"

Yep, same thing happened when I was living in NYC. The Yankees can always tell. "You're not from around here, are you?" Well, I am NOW. I'm not a mutant. Really, I'm not.

And as far as Breaux's residency goes, why didn't people jump up and down more over Hillary Clinton jumping in and running for senator of NY? The residency thing is a red herring - or an overboiled crawfish.

Ian McGibboney said...

Nick, I see your point. But I don't see the Blanco/Nagin years as an extension of much from the past. They seem to be an anomaly unto their own. And considering that the front-runners in this race are trying to mold Louisiana government into an equally repulsive nest of David Vitter-types, I'd say let's bring back someone with a history of bipartisan support and decades of experience.

Ian McGibboney said...

Leigh, it's funny how that works, because I don't have an accent or do things much differently than they do. Maybe it's when I hear words like "catawampus" and have to ask what they mean.

In any case, I love Missouri too. But being here doesn't automatically make me an expert on their politics, nor does it inherently disqualify me from still commenting on Louisiana's. Same for John Breaux.

ABDUL said...


Leigh C. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Leigh C. said...

Wait till ya hear "East Kittybumfuck". Means about the same thing as "Bumfuck Egypt".

And it can be a good thing to be up on the politics and mores of another part of the country. People usually have NO clue about how any of this stuff affects them in their East Kittybumfuck enclaves unless there is someone from out of their environs walking and talking in their midst.

yournamehere said...

Obama was polling 65-35 against 'undecided' but beat Keyes 70-30. In other words, anyone on earth would have done better than Keyes.

Speechie said...

I think I know what catawampus...but just to be safe...what does that mean???

Interestingly enough, would you believe that people in Utah always ask me if I'm from the south? And I'm like, "The South of what? The South of Salt Lake???"

Unfortunately, and this is probably going to get me deleted...but I think that Nick is having a hard time weening himself from Momma Louisiana's tits...every state, every nation for that matter, can only benefit from having leadership that has lived in a variety of places and experienced a variety of lifestyles and ways of doing.

What Breaux learned in Maryland has the potential of pulling Louisiana out of it slum...because unfortunately, it's in a slum...I know I've lived there...and I've lived better places too. Not to say that Louisiana is completely hopeless. I could be living in Missouri :D j/k

The point is that it's life experience and wisdom that makes the best leaders. Only using homegrown and home-fried leaders is what keeps Louisiana in the slums.

Just because they've lived there forever doesn't mean they know what's best, or that they even have a clue what the problems are.

I met plenty of people in Lafayette who couldn't have pointed me in the general direction of Morgan, LA or even Lake Charles if their lives were dependent upon it, let alone tell me what the biggest problems were in those cities or even in Lafayette. And these were people who wanted to be in state and city politics some day...and occasionally, people that already were.

It makes me sad...and it makes me say it's time that Louisiana went out and bought every resident a pair of Pull-ups and a bottle.

It's time for a change.

Ian McGibboney said...

(Laughter, applause)

That's true in a lot of ways, Speechie. Indeed, I was once that way myself. I can still remember the first time I drove alone to another town...I was petrified. Now that I've driven across the country twice and live in another state, that trip seems like a blip. Indeed, I'm practically claustrophobic if I stay in one place too long. And I became that way after meeting friends from other places.

There is definitely a culture in Louisiana of, "This is the best place in the world so there's no reason to care about anyplace else." Which I could understand in a place like New Orleans, which truly is unique and is worth the hype; but the rest of Louisiana? Eh. Maybe Lafayette, a little. It's a nice enough place, but why everyone thinks it warrants such hubris is beyond me.

But it does speak to the paradoxical nature of Louisianians that they'll claim lifelong loyalty to everything about their state, and then banish someone to the perimeter forever for having the nerve to leave the state for a couple of years. Come on, John Breaux represented Louisiana until 2005. He was gone for TWO YEARS! I see everyone still claims Ali Landry and Jake Delhomme, and they've both been gone for much longer than that!

Oh, right...Breaux's running against Bobby Jindal, who hasn't exactly lived his whole life in LA either. I got a pretzel in my head.

Ian McGibboney said...

Oh, and "catawampus" apparently means "catacorner," which some people misspell as "catty-corner." Ick.

Nick said...


Your comment towards me was downright stupid. I have lived outside of Louisiana, away from LA's "tits", but came back and chose to stay because I do want to change the state for the better.

The first step is getting us as far away from the last 70 years of politics, of which Breaux was a big part for the last 30.

But my question to you, what's the bug up your ass that makes you want to pass around insults when I rarely even address you? Are you just that frickin' bitter?

And if the Democrats really wanted to help change Louisiana and get rid of the old guard, they would be trying to recruit John Kennedy to run. Instead, they're completely content with keeping the good ole boy system in place.

Ian McGibboney said...

Nick, while I would perhaps have stated it a little differently, I do agree with Speechie that Louisiana needs to open its mind to how other places do their thing. Education can never hurt.

I brought up my personal experiences because I consider myself learned, attuned to world news and more liberal than the population at large, which startd in my childhood. And yet, how long did it take me to learn that people in other states do things differently? College? Hell, I used to think everyone in the United States celebrated Mardi Gras, ate crawfish, had cypress trees and knew someone named Boudreaux or Thibodeaux. And that baffles me in retrospect. I think the Cajun culture would only strengthen its bond with its celebrants if it wasn't the only thing most of them ever knew. That's a huge problem, and part of the reason that the culture's supposedly dying. As soon as you leave the area for somewhere far away, you feel the effect of it not being there. And even if it wasn't the best fit for you, you do begin to appreciate what you had when you were there.

And that's why not only do I think John Breaux is the best candidate for governor, but I think all future governors should be at LEAST that worldly. True, Breaux has been entrenched in the system for the past 30 years; but he was in fact one of the few legit buffers we had to the corruption. He's been around, and people take him seriously. So should all of us.