Monday, October 04, 2004

Double-decker caption contest

Two pics for the price of one this week!

THIS star...is America! Posted by Hello

--George W. Bush makes a point
--Wow! Red, white and blue really does clash with yellow!
--Dubya points out his new "Fifty Points of Light" plan
--If you're going to burn the flag, wrap yourself in it first!
--"Um...uh...wait, I know this!...Uh, um, Guatemala?"
--"Dick Cheney, COME ON DOWN!"
--Bush: one middle finger away from peace
--"Which way is the wind blowing? That's where I stand"
--"Let the EEEE-eagle Soarrrrrr!"
--"Dammit! When you said bars, I thought you meant..."
--"Gee, this ice-cream cone sure is hard to chew"
--Bush got used to answering the IQ question swiftly and quietly
--Dubya discloses how many military funerals he has attended...and adds one
--Is that finger lying? Only Laura knows for sure...
--Bush shows his famous "dual-pleasure" position for Halliburton lobbyists
--"I hereby rechristen this flag 'The Stars and Wars'"
--Introducing the first un-American Flag
--"And to the Republicans for which it stands..."
--Duty, honor, country...one out of three isn't bad

18 comments:

Michael said...

"Wrapping yourself...in...the flag...it's hard work."

Ian McGibboney said...

Nice! Here's another one:

Bush won "American False Idol" with his pulse-pounding rendition of "She Bangs!"

Phillip said...

Lehrer: "How many countries are in the Coalition of the Willing Mr. President?"

Bush: "There's this many"

Kyle said...

"Look, there's that French looking weasel sucking off Ted Kennedy!"

jetbanana said...

These fingers don't need no freakin manicure!

Anonymous said...

unlike my opponent, I actually have one position on everything.

Ian McGibboney said...

Yep, whether it's the need for the Iraq War or the reasons behind the regressive tax cut, George W. Bush can always be counted on never to flip-flop.

Kyle said...

The same regressive tax cuts that Kerry endorsed.

jetbanana said...

Ian, you're too cute to be a liberal.

Michael said...

Au contraire, Ian is exactly cute enough to be a liberal. We have better hair, better skin, better manners, and probably better manicures, if it comes to that. Conservatives are too busy buying world domination to bother about their appearances.

Michael said...

"I have this many brain cells left!"

ThomasMcCay said...

"God appointed me! I am the One!"

jetbanana said...

Oh, that's right, I forgot that liberals are girly-men. No thanks, honey, I don't want a man who spends more time on his hair and nails than I do, and I sure as heck don't want to share my moisturizer with him.

Ian McGibboney said...

I don't use any of that stuff. I just clip my nails and keep clean.

As for the manicure quote? Well, it turns out that Carl Cameron of Fox News MADE IT UP! But most people don't know that because they're still tired from dissing Dan Rather for accurately reporting what he didn't know to be false information.

I am working on a new column about the difference. It should be posted on here by tonight.

jetbanana said...

It was widely reported that on the day of the debate Pres Bush visited hurricane victims and John Kerry got a manicure. So he really didn't get the manicure? Or was it just Cameron's fictious quotes attributed to Kerry that were untrue? Set me straight on that, please.

Someone better tell Michael Moore that he needs to get with the program. He looks as though he needs a shower and a haircut and probably a good teeth cleaning.

Ian McGibboney said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Ian McGibboney said...

Jetbanana,

Cameron falsified Kerry's quotes about the manicure. You can read about that incident at http://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/story/237804p-204107c.html

I can't say for sure whether or not he had a manicure, not that I would care if he did. Besides, I doubt a mnaicure would take all day and leave Kerry unable to talk to anyone.

As for Michael Moore, I agree. As he showed on the cover of his 1996 book "Downsize This!", he can be clean and clean-shaven and still make excellent points. His rabble-rouser look should be matphorical, not literal. We don't need a Rush Limbaugh.

[Edited for forgetting to delete the previous comment, which I had pasted onto this comment for personal reference.]

jetbanana said...

Thanks, Ian.