Wednesday, August 18, 2004

More T-shits from the right

In their never-ending quest to re-moralize and de-oralize America, right-wingers often overlook the basic necessities of life, such as looking GOOOOD! Those crazy liberal stores such as Sears, K-Mart and Dollar General don't help things, what with their refusal to stock clothing that TRULY proud Americans need to wear! American-flag apparel? Bah! Where's the dead Iraqi carcasses? And where can one find the ultimate outlet for shirts that perfectly match the 14 pro-life bumper stickers and 10 fishies adorning the back of their SUV?

Fear no more! The Internet has solved these problems! Right-Wing Stuff and are twin towers of treasure for the fashion-conscious conservative. The best part is, shopping no longer means having to log off of fair and balanced debate about Bush's Godliness at Free Republic! Yes, God (the GOP-Jesus one, that is) has truly Blessed America!

For even more convenience, here is some window shopping for you wingnuts out there. These shirts are just too good to pass up. See you at the polls!

Right-Wing Stuff opens this post with its greatest hits!

Because nothing screams "cowboy" quite like Hollywood actors and Connecticut Yankees!

For the conservative who is also a closet Communist! A big hit in the red states...

A sucky sequel to an overrated movie; is that an association Bush really wants? Will be followed in November by Kerry: Revolutions!

I thought elephants had larger penises...and that they pissed something other than oil...?

Is faith your bag? Is it not enough to practice your religion in your heart and in your church? Do you need highly visible tools to show the world that you are a certified Christian and that you're so much better than those heathens who merely read the Bible rather than thump it and attend church only twice a week? Well now, for the featured act, your suppository...uh, repository for all things Xtian (And W-tian)! Presenting!

Oddly enough, this one's available in a tight babydoll style:

The best selling Baby Rib Basic Classic Girl from American Apparel. True short sleeves, with binding at neck and sleeve openings. These shirts fit snug on the body. 100% cotton (5.8 oz.). White only.

Abstinence makes the heart grow fonder. So do breasts! Thank God for tight shirts!

At some point, someone had "coming out of the closet" on their mind...

WORD to my brotha and his keepa!

Nothing screams Christian compassion quite like cammies, a rifle and a makeshift bayonet!

This may be nitpicking, but isn't placing words on the American flag considered desecration?

Can't wait to see THOSE action figures!

On the eighth day, God created Sonic the Hedgehog...

Go Grrrl! Actually, she's pretty hot. Got digits?


Hmmmm...I'm thinking! I'm thinking!

I hate to nitpick again, but isn't pride a deadly sin? Especially if Texas is involved?

WWJD? RFP, of course!! See why I hope he's running!

Still going...nothing outlasts an Energizer evangelist...hate keeps going and going and going...

That one's for the homeless evangelist who finds that Chick tracts just don't warm the body quite like a shirt.

Last but not least, here's one that just warms the heart in that uniquely faithful way:

Really?!! Like, get out!

Right-Wing Stuff and God and Bush! And screw the mall!

THIS JUST IN: Right-Wing Stuff is back online. At least it is as of this minute (1:56 a.m.). When I first posted this, they were down. Coincidence??


oyster said...

With the collection you just presented, it's hard to know where to begin in my comments. I'm astonished by the variety of what's available, frankly.

But let me just say that the Che GeBusha shirt is one profoundly disturbing and hilarious visage. If I saw some typical college Repub type wearing that, I think I'd laugh my ass off.

Liz "the Biz" said...

Nice, very nice. Both highly amusing and disturbing at the same time. I think my favorite one was the "going to hell" one and the "onward christian soldiers" one. I weep for the people of this world.

Anyway, keep up the good work, kiddo.

Michael said...

Bush as Che Guevara: it is to laugh. And yes, you're right: it's illegal to put words or other symbols on the flag.

But the one that really freaks me out is that first "Christian soldier" one. Perhaps someone forgot to tell the graphic, er, artist who made up that design that the grave markers for Christian soldiers are white crosses? Or were they trying to suggest that the only good Christian soldier is a dead soldier (presumably only if s/he dies fighting the heathen)?